What is my response when the unexpected or undesirable happens? For most of my life, my reaction was to ignore it and use drugs to avoid situations I couldn’t handle. Unfortunately, once we get sober, situations in life are sometimes still overwhelming and undesirable. If you are an alcoholic or addict in early recovery, those situations can feel insurmountable. This is the benefit of a fellowship of people with more time sober than yourself, who can provide guidance and redirection. For the first few years of my sobriety, I didn’t even know how to pay my bills on time or make it to work regularly. That was where I was at and I’m ok with it. I learned through trial and error, making mistakes and apologizing and through acting on people’s advice.
I’ll share with you the most foolproof way I’ve been taught on how to deal with life. A word of warning: this method is UNCOMFORTABLE. You will not find relief instantly but you will find it over the long term. If you want instant relief, you can try but my experience has shown me that my knee-jerk reactions to life often cause me and others harm.
If you are in doubt, reach out. Pause. Ask for your higher power’s direction and for the right thought or action to come. If you still don’t know, go to a meeting. Ask how you can help someone else and don’t talk about yourself. Call your sponsor. If they don’t answer, call your grand-sponsor. If they don’t answer, call your great-grand sponsor. The correct solution to your problem will come easily, you won’t have to force it. Keep yourself in service until that solution is presented to you. Only then, after you feel a sense of calm direction and have run this idea by someone else, should you move forward. The universe doesn’t always work on our timetable but I’ve found that things seem to work out better for me when I trust the process, even if I don’t understand it.