Recovery is hard work. We are asked to take a lifetime of thinking and behavior patterns and be willing to toss them aside for a whole new set of tools. This takes practice and discipline to be willing to continue to strive towards a principled way of living. Sometimes I get tired of meditating, of pausing when agitated, of meetings and of no longer getting the quick fix of ‘getting my way’. Selfishness and self-centeredness are definitely the root of my troubles. We all want what we want when we want it. That’s very human. It’s okay to have days where it’s more of a struggle to show up for life than others. It’s okay to make mistakes too. The joy of living is more tied to the totality of experience rather than a narrow definition being a perfect person in recovery. From my few years of experience, there are no perfect people in recovery. I’ve never met one. You are doing just fine, even if you are making mistakes and making amends for them or if you aren’t where you think you should be – you are still doing just fine. Keep doing the work as best you can. The universe is guiding us for our greater good and all the lessons we learn are preparing us for each next step of the way.
